Names as Freud would have seen them...

A psychiatrist was conducting a group therapy session with four young
mothers and their small children.

"You all have obsessions," he observed.

To the first mother, he said, "You are obsessed with eating. You've even named your daughter Candy."

He turned to the second Mom. "Your obsession is with money. Again, it
manifests itself in your child's name, Penny."

He turns to the third Mom. "Your obsession is alcohol. This too manifests itself in your child's name, Brandy."

At this point, the fourth mother gets up, takes her little boy by the hand and whispers, "Come on, Dick, we're leaving."

I Swear

The last few weeks, Malaysians have been treated to various personalities making all kinds of remarks, promises, swears.

Saiful 'I Swear'

DPM 'I swear'

Tajol Rosli 'I swear'


For all intent and purposes, this must be the number 1 hit song for the moment in the country.

So, sit back and enjoy.

The grapevine in the industry said that there are various personalities working on the next hit song entitled 'SD'. ..

PM quietly takes the LRT??

The Star paper reported that the PM 'quietly' took the Komuter and the LRT to the city centre yesterday. At first reading, and judging from the captioned pictures, it would seem like a real 'quiet' event.

Until closer look at the Star on line pictures....

'Quietly' is a relative word, i supposed. The coterie of reporters, personal body guards, other VIP, officials would have made the ride hardly a 'quiet' event. Perhaps, it was 'quiet' because the police outriders were missing, hand kissing and posturing greeters waiting in line were also missing...

I have seen pictures of Mr. Brown (PM of the UK) taking the morning train, all alone...

I cabar our PM to do this:

Take the train all by yourself.

Dell Vostro 1200

Just bought a new Dell Vostro 1200 laptop with 4GB RAM, fingerprint reader, camera, DVD R/W, Truelife screen, extended battery, the whole works to replace the Dell XPS 1310 that i have been using for about 1 year now.

In the office, the laptop is normally closed since it will be connected to a Dell 17 inch LCD monitor, and a full size external Dell keyboard. The keyboard on the Vostro is therefore only used at home or when on the road.

So, it came as a rude shock therefore to find the keyboard on the Vostro having a loose button that pooped out/opened when pressed on the left side of the button. OK, this maybe a one off problem.

Dell was quite fast in getting the keypad replaced/repaired after the first complaint. However, immediately after the repair on one key, another key popped out/up.

This is NOT something i expect from Dell at all.

I have told them i do not want this unit.... Let's see what they will do next.

The Cherry Tree...

Legend has it that George Washington, America's first president, chopped down a cherry tree in his youth. George gave the tree a good swing and chopped it down with an axe. His father saw the damaged tree and asked his son if he knew who did the deed. George was quoted bravely admitting the truth:- "I can't tell a lie, Pa; you know I can't tell a lie. I did cut it with my axe."

This is a satire of how some Malaysian politicians circa 2008 may have reacted to the question:-

PM Badawi - I did not cut down the tree, I was just taking a nap underneath it.

Najib - I swear that I have never MET that tree.

Hishamuddin- ... but I only own a keris, not axe, how to cut down the tree.

Dr.M - Apa nama cherry tree, I chopped it down because, I don't like the idea of Pak lah sleeping under it.

Chua Soi Lek - Yes it was me, I resign as caretaker of this orchard.

VK Lingam - It could be me, it might have been me but I don't think it’s me.

Anwar Ibrahim - I DID NOT do it, and I am not giving any DNA samples for you to plant on the axe handle.

Khir Toyo - the new state government should just trim the grass and not waste time asking who cut the tree.

Ahmad Said (Terrenganu MB)- I chopped it because cherry trees are more expensive to maintain than durian trees.

Azalina Othman - The cherry tree is not included under my tourism MOU so I
cut it down. Besides there were unauthorized signboards put up around the tree.

Shabery Cheek - I challenge you to a debate on tree cutting.

Samy Velu - I chopped it because HINDRAF members were using it as a meeting point

Wira Ali Rustam - We have planted Durian trees for 50 years and we will plant them for another 50 years, we do not need cheery trees, apple trees, pear trees and all these other foreign trees.

Rais Yatim - you must see the bigger picture, Ahmad said cherry trees are expensive to maintain, Ali Rustan said that are against our national identity and I needed to test my new axe, so you see- it’s a WIN-WIN situation all around.

Sharir Samad - I cut the tree because we could no longer afford to subsidize it.

Karpal Singh - The bigfoot creature did it.

Bung Mokhtar - The big monkey did it

Pandikar Amin Mulia - There is nothing in the standing orders against
chopping cherry trees, Kinabatangan duduk, Bukit Gelugor duduk.sit down.

Khairy Jamaluddin - I did not do it, neither did the mat rempits. By the way, what's a cherry tree ?

Lim Kit Siang - In response to Khairy - cherry tree also you don't know, you are an insult to Oxford.

Nazri Aziz - racist, racist, racist, when we cut down durian trees nobody made a fuss.

Malaysian Citizens - oh for heavens sake! Somebody plant something before
we all starve to death.

Final scenes of anti forum protest

This is the kind of situation that leads to unwanted events. Whether one is thinking rationally in the name of religion or some other factors, I suppose only the persons involved would be able to answer.
What is 'fair' and 'just' seems to depend more and more on who decides what is 'fair and just'. It has nothing to do with what is right or wrong anymore.
Surely the lawyers were well aware if they have done something illegal; and surely the crowd outside gathered without permit? Surely the crowd outside disturbed the peace? Why was there no action against the oppressed?
I supposed it is a matter of who is 'oppressed'....

I do not boast that God is on my side,” wrote Abraham Lincoln. “I humbly pray that I am on God’s side.”

Throughout history, people have done despicable deeds while boldly claiming that God was on their side. God is on the side of those who are on His side—who know His heart and mind and do His will—not those who insist on convincing God and others that their way is right.
Instead of jumping into a situation with the presumption that God is on our side, we need to be certain that we are on His.

It’s dangerous to mistake our wishes for God’s will.

While on trips to the USA...

It is now at a least a once a year trip to the USA since 2001. And there have been many eventful moments during these trips.

In 2001, we were caught by 9/11. We were actually on our way to Newark Airport for our afternoon flight to Amsterdam. We were on the highway leading to the airport, and from NJ side, we could see the two towers with billowing smoke. And, while we were watching from afar, we witnesses the 2nd tower collapsed. We ended up at Niagara Falls for about 4 days before we could fly to Amsterdam.

In the years since, there was also a trip where i had to exit the plane just before take off. The plane lost all hydraulics oil while it was taxing for take off!! I supposed it could have been worst...if the total absence of hydraulics was only discovered after take off..

We had to abandoned our schedule once to get ahead of a hurricane...

Last year, we had to turn around after take off to make a landing with fire engines trailing beside the plane. This time round, the pilot noticed some metal sheet flapping on the wing of the aircraft. It would seem someone did not tightened a few screws to lock in a few sheet metal claddings.

So far this trip has been smooth..

Long flight....

The trip started off at 315pm on Sunday. It was a short hop to Taipei, a flight of 4 hours 35 minutes. The transit time at Taipei was supposed to be only 2 hours, and the flight was supposed to take off at 920pm. We did not get off until 1030pm.

The flight from Taipei to Los Angeles took 12 hours 10 minutes. And we touched down at about 730pm.

Next was a 3 hours 30 minutes flight to Minneapolis after a 6 hours transit at LAX.

We got in to MSP at 6AM, which is about 7PM Monday in Malaysia.

All in, the time it took to arrive at MSP from KUL was some 30 hours.... Jolly long flight..

Flat tire

On the way home from work last night, the rear right tire must have picked up a nail somewhere. Upon exiting the car, i thought the height was not quite right; and on examination, found the tire was deflating.

Quick pump up at the gas station filled the tire to the prescribed pressure.

In the morning, the tire was completely flat. And to change a flat tire on a slight gradient driveway is not easy. Plus the fact that the tire was a brand new 225/65 size, it prooved to be quite a handful.

The spare tire is one of those tiny/puny sized thingy with a bright yellow notice that the vehicle fitted with the spare should not exceed 80kph or 40mph. It served its intended purpose, i supposed, since it got me to the tire shop.

Must be one of the slowest drive i ever did....

New words ALL malaysian should know and use...

Words Malaysians can incorporate into their daily lives:

"Anwarized" - meaning: To get back-stabbed..
i.e. People who have been anwarized may contact the DPM's hotline

"Badawized" - meaning: To be stupified
i.e. Malaysians seem to be badawized by the media which reports biased news

"Najibbed" - meaning: To be blown to bits
i.e. In this country,you better be careful with what you say, you can be najibbed otherwise

"Petrad" - meaning: To be exposed
i.e. Lately the BN coalition has been petrad in many ways

"KayJayed" - meaning: To shout for no reason
i.e. He kayjayed in the Dewan and appeared like a moron

"Balaed" - meaning: To vanish suddenly
i.e. They opposition balaed from the meeting in protest

"Lingamed" - meaning: To repeat redundantly
i.e. The Information Minister lingamed the same rubbish in the debate recently.

"Soileked" - meaning: To be caught on tape
i.e. People have stopped using budget hotels as they are afraid of being soileked.

As short Malaysian fiction :
Altantuya was cold bloodedly najibbed after she attempted to petra Najib for anwarising her and not making the promised payments.
Razak was badawized into covering up for Najib while Najib balaed from the scene. Razak was actually anwarized.
However Najib lingamed that he had nothing to do with it and has been kayjaying on the topic in an attempt to prove his innocence.
Nevertheless, some quarters have been threatening that they have soileked evidence that Najib was involved.

To Love Malaysia, is to know Malaysia"